Very Random Questions

I posted this on myspace a few days ago.. funniest survey questions ever.

1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
— I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say Chris Hanson from Dateline NBC.

2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Who goes?
— Nelly fucktardo

3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
— The assclown that stole my pump at the gas station yesterday. NO I AM STILL NOT OVER IT!!

4. What is your favorite cheese?
— The kind that comes on the nachos at Applebees. It’s seriously not regular cheese. Maybe it isn’t cheese.. maybe its a cheese flavored sauce.

5. You can only have one kind of sandwich.
— A Trash Can from Greasy Tony’s hold the mushrooms. UGH YUM <3

6. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?
— Mark Walberg. If anyone has ever seen Boogie Nights then they will know why *wink wink*

7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music celebrity of your choice.
— Hmm. Possibly LL Cool J. But hes getting kind of old now.. I might have to go with his genetic twin Tyrese.

8. Now that you’ve slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. What do you buy?
— Well for $100 I could either go to Macy’s and buy 1/2 a shoe or go to Ross and fashionably clothe all the orphans in Nigeria. I’ll go to Macy’s.

9. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
— I’d sell it on Ebay.

10. An angel appears out of heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the beverage of your choice. It is?
— Patron. I’d never have a reason to leave the house again.

12. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anywhere in the PAST. Where do you go?
— I would prove my theory that Jesus was a smokin hot babe in his 20′s.

13. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules.
— No mushrooms are allowed to grow on my island. Gorillas will be trained as law enforcement officers.. and will hereby be reffered to as the “G Unit”.

14. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called?
— Dancing with the Farm Animals. Sort of like that “dancing with the stars” show except celebrities will be dancing with pigs, chickens, cows and ducks. This will score big ratings with Jerry Springer fans.

15. What is your favorite curse word?
— BITCHTITS!

16. One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, what do you do?
— Take pictures so I can sue my landlord for all hes worth.

17. Your house is on fire! What do you do?
— Grab an industrial sized garbage bag that will be conveniently laying by my bedside and fill it with my prized posessions. Then run outside and laugh because I have high-coverage renters insurance.

18. The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour?
— Grab a chicken fajita pita from Jack in the Box and post a myspace bulletin.

19. You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What super-power is it?
— OOoooh I can be cast in the next season of Heroes! I’d probably choose invisibility.

20. You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
— Christmas time at my grandparents’ house probably when I was 10 or 11 and nobody hated each other and the biggest thing anyone worried about was my grandma snatching your glass and putting it in the dishwasher if you left it unattended for more then 7.2 seconds!

21. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
— God just one? The past 2 years of my life would be nice not to remember.

22. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check this out… you can move to any country…where do you go?
— The United Kingdom so I can say stuff like “thats bullocks!” and “ello govnah!”

23. This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age, if you were banned from every bar in the world except one, which one would it be?
— Umm obviously if I didn’t get banned from this ONE bar then its a sucky bar that I never go to.

24. Hopefully you didn’t mention this in the super-powers question… If you did, then we’ll just expand on that. Check it out… Suddenly, you have gained the ability to fly! Whose house are you going to fly to first, and be like “Check it out…I can FLY!”?
— I’d fly up to heaven and kick it with Noah and shizzle. I’d be like “Wuddup Noah, whos pimper nowwwwwww?”

25. The constant absorption of magical moon beans mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life?
— Bob Barker. No wait hes not dead yet.. umm.. Anna Nicole’s son so he can pwn Howard Stern.

Thursday, October 18th, 2007 at 9:26 pm and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.